About-cancer/coping/caregiver-support/zh

对癌症患者看护者的支持

如果您正在通过癌症治疗帮助家人或朋友，那么您就是保姆。 这可能意味着帮助日常活动，例如去看医生或做饭。 这也可能意味着协调服务和护理。 也可能是在情感和精神上给予支持。

以下提示适用于大多数癌症护理人员。 但是，对于患有晚期癌症的护理人员，治疗结束后的护理人员，有儿童癌症的父母以及有家庭成员癌症的青少年，还有更多详细信息可用。

与照顾者打交道

在这段时间内给予照顾和支持可能是一个挑战。 许多护理人员将他们自己的需求和感受放在一边，专注于癌症患者。 这可能很难长期维持，并且对您的健康不利。 压力会同时影响身体和心理。 如果您不照顾自己，那么您将无法照顾别人。 对所有人来说，照顾自己很重要。

有关更多信息，请参阅《爱心人士正接受癌症治疗时的NCI手册》。

改变角色

无论您是年轻还是年长，您都可能会扮演看护者的新角色。 您可能曾经是某人生活中的活跃部分，但也许现在他们已经成为癌症患者，因此您对他们的支持方式有所不同。 可能是因为您没有太多经验，或者感觉比以前更强烈。 尽管现在看护对您来说感觉很新，但许多看护者说，他们在经历亲人的癌症经历时会学到更多。 他们描述的常见情况：

• 患者可能只对照顾他们的配偶或伴侣感到舒服

• 带孩子的照顾者也很难照顾父母

• 家长可以有一个很难接受帮助，从他们的成年子女

• 照顾者发现很难在照顾亲人和工作职责之间取得平衡

• 患有癌症的成年孩子可能不想依靠父母照顾

• 照顾者本身可能会有健康问题，因此很难在身体和情感上照顾其他人

无论您现在担任什么角色，这一次通常都会感到困惑和压力。 如果可以，请尝试与他人或加入支持小组分享您的感受。或者你可以选择寻求一个辅导员的帮助。

妈妈一直是家庭中的磐石。 现在几乎就像我们是父母，而她是孩子。 这很难，因为我们有自己的孩子要照顾和工作。

-布莱恩

请求帮忙

许多护理人员说，回头看，他们对自己承担了太多。 或者，他们希望自己早点寻求朋友或家人的帮助。 诚实地了解您可以做什么和不能做什么。 您需要什么或想做自己的事情？ 您可以完成哪些任务或与他人共享？ 乐于放弃别人可以帮助您的事情。 一些示例可能是：

• 帮助做家务，例如做饭，打扫卫生，购物或做院子工作

• 照顾孩子或从学校或活动中接孩子

• 驱使您所爱的人去约会或买药

• 成为保持他人最新状态的联系人

接受他人的帮助并不总是那么容易。 但是请记住，为自己寻求帮助也可以帮助您所爱的人–您可以保持健康，您所爱的人可能对自己所做的一切感到内，某些帮手可能会提供有用的技能，并有额外的时间奉献给他人 您。 SignUpGeniusExit免责声明或Lotsa帮助手退出免责声明等网站可以帮助您组织请求和任务。

为某些人做好准备，以帮助他们

当某人患有严重疾病时，朋友和家人经常伸出援手。 有时，您不太了解的人也想帮忙。 但重要的是要意识到，有些人可能无法帮助您。 您可能想知道为什么当您与他人打交道时，有人不愿意提供帮助。 一些常见的原因是：

• 有些人可能正在解决自己的问题

• 有些人可能没有时间

• 他们害怕癌症，或者可能已经有不良的癌症经历。 他们不想卷入并再次感到痛苦

• 有些人认为当人们挣扎时最好保持距离

• 有时人们没有意识到事情对您来说真的有多难。 否则，除非您直接向他们寻求帮助，否则他们不知道您需要帮助

• 有些人感到尴尬，因为他们不知道如何表达自己的关心

如果某人没有为您提供所需的帮助，则可能需要与他们交谈并解释您的需求。 或者，您也可以放手。 但是，如果这种关系很重要，您可能想告诉对方您的感受。 这可以帮助防止积怨或压力增加。 从长远来看，这些感觉可能会损害您的关系。

照顾好自己

所有家庭护理人员都需要支持。 但由于您不是癌症患者，您可能会觉得您的需求现在并不重要。 否则，您就没有时间了。 您可能已经习惯于照顾其他人，因此很难改变重点。 但是，照顾自己的需求，希望和欲望可以使您拥有继续前进所需要的力量。 （当您爱的人因癌症接受治疗时，请参阅手册中的看护者权利法案：对看护者的支持。）

照顾自己的方法 花时间充实自己的思想，身体和精神可以帮助您成为更好的照料者。 您可能需要考虑以下几点：

为自己腾出时间

• 找时间放松。 每天至少需要15-30分钟才能为自己做某事。 例如，尝试腾出时间小睡，锻炼，做院子工作，业余爱好，看电视或看电影，或者尝试放松一下。 做些柔和的运动，例如伸展运动或瑜伽。 或者，深呼吸或静坐一分钟。 请参阅学会放松。
• 不要忽视您的个人生活。 减少个人活动，但不要完全消除。 例如，寻找与朋友联系的简单方法。
• 保持常规。 如果可以，请尝试继续进行一些常规活动。 如果您不这样做，研究表明它可以增加您的压力。 您可能需要在一天中的其他时间或比平时更少的时间做某事，但请尝试仍然这样做。
• 请求帮忙。 通过寻求帮助找到更多的“下班”时间。找到的东西别人能做到的或为你安排，如约会或出差。

了解你的感受

为自己的想法和感受提供出路很重要。 考虑一下什么可以帮助您振奋精神。 与他人交谈会减轻您的负担吗？ 还是您宁愿自己一个个安静的时间？ 根据生活中发生的事情，也许两者都需要。 这对您和其他人了解您的需求很有帮助。

You may also be able to find some comfort by reading the Feelings section of our website. See if any of them relate to you and what you can do for support.

Join a Support Group

Support groups can meet in person, by phone, or online. They may help you gain new insights into what is happening, get ideas about how to cope, and help you know that you're not alone. In a support group, people may talk about their feelings, trade advice, and try to help others who are dealing with the same kinds of issues. Some people like to go and just listen. And others prefer not to join support groups at all. Some people aren't comfortable with this kind of sharing.

If you can't find a group in your area, try a support group online. Some caregivers say websites with support groups have helped them a lot.

Learn More about Cancer

Sometimes understanding your cancer patient’s medical situation can make you feel more confident and in control. For example, you may want to know more about his stage of cancer. It may help you to know what to expect during treatment, such as the tests and procedures that will be done, as well as the side effects that will result.

Talk to Others about What You're Going Through

Studies show that talking with other people about what you're dealing with is very important to most caregivers. It's especially helpful when you feel overwhelmed or want to say things that you can't say to your loved one with cancer. Try to find someone you can really open up to about your feelings or fears.

You may want to talk with someone outside your inner circle. Some caregivers find it helpful to talk to a counselor, such as a social worker, psychologist, or leader in their faith or spiritual community. These types of experts may be able to help you talk about things that you don't feel you can talk about with friends or family. They can also help you find ways to express your feelings and learn ways to cope that you hadn't thought of before.

Connect with Your Loved One with Cancer

Cancer may bring you and your loved one closer together than ever before. Often people become closer as they face challenges together. If you can, take time to share special moments with one another. Try to gain strength from all you are going through together, and what you have dealt with so far. This may help you move toward the future with a positive outlook and feelings of hope.

Write in a Journal

Research shows that writing or journaling can help relieve negative thoughts and feelings. And it may actually help improve your own health. You might write about your most stressful experiences. Or you may want to express your deepest thoughts and feelings. You can also write about things that make you feel good, such as a pretty day or a kind coworker or friend.

Look for the Positive

It can be hard finding positive moments when you're busy caregiving. It also can be hard to adjust to your role as a caregiver. Caregivers say that looking for the good things in life and feeling gratitude help them feel better. And know that it's okay to laugh, even when your loved one is in treatment. In fact, it's healthy. Laughter releases tension and makes you feel better. Keeping your sense of humor in trying times is a good coping skill.

Be Thankful

You may feel thankful that you can be there for your loved one. You may be glad for a chance to do something positive and give to another person in a way you never knew you could. Some caregivers feel that they've been given the chance to build or strengthen a relationship. This doesn't mean that caregiving is easy or stress-free. But finding meaning in caregiving can make it easier to manage.

Caring for Your Body

When I get home from class, my mom and I take turns running while one of us stays with my dad. My run is my time for me, and the only way I can keep it together. -Gail

You may find yourself so busy and concerned about your loved one that you don't pay attention to your own physical health. But it's very important that you take care of your health, too. Doing so will give you strength to help others. It's important to:

• Stay up-to-date with your medical needs

Keep up with your own checkups, screenings, and other appointments.

• Watch for signs of depression or anxiety

Stress can cause many different feelings or body changes. But if they last for more than two weeks, talk to your doctor.

• Take your medicine as prescribed

Ask your doctor to give you a large prescription to save trips to the pharmacy. Find out if your grocery store or pharmacy delivers.

• Try to eat healthy meals

Eating well will help you keep up your strength. If your loved one is in the hospital or has long doctor's appointments, bring easy-to-prepare food from home. For example, sandwiches, salads, or packaged foods and canned meats fit easily into a lunch container.

• Get enough rest

Listening to soft music or doing breathing exercises may help you fall asleep. Short naps can energize you if you aren't getting enough sleep. Be sure to talk with your doctor if lack of sleep becomes an ongoing problem.

• Exercise

Walking, swimming, running, or bike riding are only a few ways to get your body moving. Any kind of exercise (including working in the garden, cleaning, mowing, or going up stairs) can help you keep your body healthy. Finding at least 15-30 minutes a day to exercise may make you feel better and help manage your stress.

New stresses and daily demands often add to any health problems caregivers already have. And if you are sick or have an injury that requires you to be careful, it's even more important that you take care of yourself. Here are some changes caregivers often have:

• fatigue (feeling tired)
• weaker immune system (poor ability to fight off illness)
• sleep problems
• slower healing of wounds
• higher blood pressure
• changes in appetite or weight
• headaches
• anxiety, depression, or other mood changes

Long-Distance Caregiving It can be really tough to be away from a loved one who has cancer. You may feel like you're a step behind in knowing what is happening with his or her care. Yet even if you live far away, it's possible for you to give support and be a problem-solver and care coordinator.

Caregivers who live more than an hour away from their loved ones most often rely on the telephone or email as their communication link. But either of these methods can be rather limiting when trying to assess someone's needs. Aside from true medical emergencies, long-distance caregivers often need to judge whether situations can be dealt with over the phone or require an in-person visit.

Finding Contacts Near Your Loved One

Develop a relationship with one or two key members of the health care team, such as a social worker or patient educator. It may help you feel more at ease to have direct contact with someone involved in the medical care of your loved one. Also, many long-distance caregivers say that it helps to explore both paid and volunteer support. Ways you can do this are:

• Create a list of people who live near your loved one whom you could call day or night in a crisis or just to check in.
• Look into volunteer visitors, adult day care centers, or meal delivery services in the area.
• Make a list of web sites in your loved one's area to give you quick access to resources.
• Ask if the hospital keeps visitor information packets that list area agencies and contacts.
• Remember to share a list of home, work, and cell phone numbers with the health care team. You should also give this to others who are local in case of an emergency.

Other Tips

• Ask a local family member or friend to update you daily by email. Or, consider creating a web site to share news about your loved one's condition and needs. There are a number of sites available. Examples are Caring BridgeExit Disclaimer and Lotsa Helping HandsExit Disclaimer.

• Sign up for online ways to connect with people. Programs using video and instant messaging to communicate are very common. For example, Skype and FaceTime are ways people connect from a distance.

• Airlines or bus lines may have special deals for patients or family members. The hospital social worker may also know of other resources, such as private pilots, advocacy organizations, or companies that help people with cancer and their families with transportation.

• If you are traveling to see your loved one, time your flights or drives so that you have time to rest when you return. Many long-distance caregivers say that they don't allow themselves enough time to rest after their visits.

• Consider getting a phone card from a discount store to cut down on long-distance bills. Or, review your long-distance and cell phone plans. See if you can make any changes that would reduce your bills.